The Question That Changed Everything

My most recent career pivot started (really started) with a single question my wife asked me on a walk.

We were in the middle of an unexpected job loss, trying to figure out what came next, and I was spiraling a bit. You know the drill… doom-scrolling job boards, stress-eating, feeling that low-grade panic that makes every decision feel urgent and impossible at the same time.

So we walked. Long walks. The kind where you're not really going anywhere, just moving to clear your head.

And then, on one of those walks, she stopped and asked me something that changed everything.

Buckle up… and prepare for a paradigm-shifting, mind-blowing concept. (Spoiler: I may be overselling this a smidge.)

I remember stopping mid-step, looking at her like she'd just suggested we move to Mars. "Wait… you think we can do that?" I asked. And to be honest, my confusion was quickly followed by jealousy. It was simple. It was brilliant. And seriously… why hadn't I thought of it?

What she asked was this (drum roll, please):

"Sweetheart, what if we just move somewhere we know we'd love… and figure it out?"

One sentence. And something shifted.

We kept walking. Started talking through it. What matters most? What kind of work would we actually choose if we could choose anything? Where could that life happen?

Portugal came up almost immediately. We'd never been there. Didn't speak Portuguese. Had no job lined up, no inherited quinta in the Douro Valley. But it felt right. Slower mornings. Longer meals. Room to breathe.

By the time we looped back home, the urgency had faded. The panic had softened. The doom-applying… immediately stopped.

Suddenly there was space again. Space to think, breathe, and actually hear myself (and my wife, since she has some pretty darn good ideas).

"What's next?" stopped feeling overwhelming and started feeling possible. Maybe even exciting. Definitely exciting.

It quickly became clear I didn't want a rerun of an old job. I wanted something that fit the life we wanted to build… one filled with more intention, less stress, and a lot more time for what actually matters.

And then as if on cue a door opened. My friend Troy reached out about joining The Solarium Group as a Senior Affiliate. Meaningful work that fit the life we were building. Perfect timing. Amazing opportunity.

So that became my new origin story: a simple question on a walk that led to a different way of thinking (which, as I've noted, was totally my idea… eventually), and ultimately a different kind of life.

In Portugal.

These days, I start most mornings with coffee on our terrace in Braga, the dogs sprawled around my feet, watching the light change over the hills. My wife's usually in the kitchen, already planning what’s on the menu for the day. It's quiet. Intentional. Exactly what we were looking for.

"Sweetheart, what if we just move somewhere we know we'd love… and figure it out?"

That question changed everything. Not because it solved anything immediately. But because it created space… space to do things (a lot of things) differently.

I have no idea if this experiment will work long-term. So far, however, it's been something wonderful.

Sometimes the answer isn't more complicated. Sometimes it's just simpler than you think. You might just have to shift your thinking a bit.